Tuesday, March 24, 2009

How tired are you?

This is how tired I am. I was just reading a new release I wrote and came across the word typed "is". I sat there for what seemed like 5 minutes trying to figure out what I had been trying to say and why on earth I'd use the word (if it even IS a word) I's...and why I didn't capitalize the I in the word.

Then it finally dawned on me...it was simply the word "is". ha Wow...need more sleep.

Sunday, February 08, 2009

Venturing out in public...with your parents...

Well, last night I forced my parents to get out and go to the movies with me. They never go, which I don't understand..because they enjoy it when they do go. They are just happy being at home. Anyway, I have plans to go to the movies tomorrow with Kara-lew...but I also wanted to see the movie Mall Cop before it leaves. Hence, I suggested they go with.

So, we went...laughed a lot and were talking about the movie as we drove through town afterwards. If you haven't seen the movie, there is a part where he gets in a fight with a large woman in Victoria's Secret. She kicks his ass, but her shirt gets partially removed in the scuffle. I said that I enjoyed the flick and was glad I saw it, but could have done without that part. They agreed. Then we were discussing that fact that the fight originated over a push up bra and why in the world would any larger woman try and buy a push up bra to begin with. My mom said, "Well, I don't certainly don't need one of those! I need jacks! Hydraulic jacks!" ..and then commenced to making sound effects. I thought dad was gonna wreck the car, and I almost peed my pants I was laughing so hard. (she also has already stated she will deny this statement to everyone).

As we get across town, they decide to stop at Braum's for ice cream. As we're pulling in to the parking lot, he parks next to a car that has 3 teenage girls standing next to it talking to the boys inside. Not realizing we were pulling up and thinking she was putting on a show for the boys, the girl in the middle...again..the larger girl of the group...decided to do a little "percolator" dance move. That's would be the move where you shake your butt cheeks and nothing else. First of all, she had far to much junk in the trunk to pull it off, second..her cheeks were right in our face, and third...I was mortified to get out of the car..and said so. I said, "I really don't think I can even get out now, I'm too embarrassed for her and for myself to have witnessed that in front of my parents". This sent my mother into another fit of laughter and the girl finally realized we were there.

Don't get me wrong...both scenarios could easily have been me. EXCEPT: I know better than to even look twice at a push up bra, I wouldn't punch a mall cop or any cop (unless seriously provoked), and I would NOT PERCOLATE in a public parking lot...or on a dance floor- on purpose anyway. ha Besides..I've tried and tried to master that move, and I just can't do it. Ask my sister Angie. She thinks it's hilarious that I keep making her show it to me and tell me what I'm doing wrong. (yep..those are the types of things we do at the holidays).

Anyway, perhaps I shouldn't venture out with the rents again anytime soon. Heaven only knows what could happen next!

Saturday, February 07, 2009


My house hasn't sold..which bewilders me quite frankly. Admittedly, it does have a couple shortcomings, but that house is adorable, a great size, an excellent location, wonderful landscaping, a good and very fair price and is of course staged brilliantly (by me!). I know the upstairs bathroom sink is ugly and could be replaced and that the downstairs bathroom shower is odd, but it's functional. And those were the next two things on my to do list before I moved and if I ever had enough money to do them.

I did rip out the horrible pink carpeting that covered the main floor
I did redothe kitchen (icluding a new stove, new countertops, new cabinet hardware, a dishwasher &garbage disposal which were non-existent before, and new flooring)
I pretty much painted every room, and even retextured some walls!
I put in new carpeting in the stairwell and basement,
I took down wallpaper from the 3 rooms it was in.
I got rid of paneling.
I took all the lace down that had been glued to every shelf in the house.
I put in a newer and much more appealing cabinet in the bathroom.
I spent hours and hours working on the yard and flower gardens.
AND...I got rid of the hideous ruffled nightmare that were otherwise known as curtains in the main living room and dining area.

To top it off, my smart do-it-yourself mind thought to take before photos and have them in a little book for any potential buyers to see...so they can appreciate just how much HAS gone into that house.

Yes, its only been on the market for about a month. Yes, winter is not the ideal time to sell...and YES, I realize the economy is not helping my cause.

But, I've moved, have a new job (2 actually) and am currently residing in my parents basement with my two dogs until someone realizes my house to be the treasure that it is!

There really is not much on the market here..which is another problem. I've only looked at 3 houses thus far. All three which have tons of potential. 2 would be definite fixer uppers...1 quite surely being out of my league (it still had electrical fuse box rather than a breaker box, it didn't have central heat and air, only window units and a floor furnace, part of the foundation needed redone, the old porch had been closed in, but left unfinished and would need to be turned back into its former glory or a sun room of sorts, the basement had been framed, but never completed, the kitchen and bathroom needed an overhaul and the other the basement would need a bathroom put in). Pretty much more time and money than I have, and more stress than I need.

The first one I looked at was a foreclosure. It was obvious the people were angered by that, as they had gone through the entire house and sprayed something bright blue and pink all over the carpets and some walls. It needed a lot of updating, appliances, a new fence, paneling removed from the entire house, new flooring, etc. It already has a contract on it though.

THEN..there's the one I really want. It is in much better condition. It has a 2 car detached garage with storage up above. It doesn't need much. I'd put in a few walls in the basement to make a 3rd bedroom, and office, and workout room (Part of that space is already finished, just need to put up walls to divide it). Eventually I'd put a bathroom down there too. The kitchen needs some painting and I'm not sure about the flooring choice. It's nice wood paneling, but it meets up with real hardwood floors that the rest of the main floor have. I don't think I like the real and fake right up against each other. It also needs appliances. The house needs a fence too, for the doggies, and the ac unit moved..as it's in the middle of the back patio...kinda bizarre. I looked at this house the day it listed and am terrified it will be gone by the time mine sells and I can make an offer.

The other options in town are either way out of my league and price range, in the ghetto, or are just falling apart. So, here I sit...waiting impatiently for some lucky person or persons to find my house to be exactly what they're looking for...so I can grab the one that will fit the bill for me.

Why can't life be easier sometimes? A little more money? A little more luck? A little less time wasted? A little more of a happy ending? I guess it wouldn't be near as interesting then. Hmmmm.

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

The Beer Man

If you haven't seen Wendell in the Miller High Life commercials, I don't know where you've been. He's a riot and he's been doing em a while now. For the superbowl there was supposed to be a 1 second commercial, but I never saw it...He had been on Leno talking about it and showed some of them. There's a website where you can go watch a bunch of em and there are a couple longer ones too. You HAVE to go watch them. Hilarious...the best one is at the bottom with the yellow foam finger. If you only watch one..this is the one to watch. Totally hysterical!

Wendell for President!

Monday, January 26, 2009

Sunday Humor

I know I mentioned in an earlier post that I am now the Director of the High Plains Heritage Foundation here in Liberal, as well as working at my church in the office part-time.

Well every Sunday since I've been doing that, my dad makes a point to get the bulletin, find our pew, and sit down to scan it for any typos or errors I may have made. He thinks he's a riot...and actually, he usually is I suppose. Anyway, today I sat down and saw him looking through it. I said, "You're not going to find any typos...cause I'm brilliant". He laughed and said okay. We made it past the greetings, the scriptures, a couple songs, the children's message, and the sermon and then all stood to sing the last hymn. The music started and everyone started to sing, but something was wrong...it just didn't go together. I am not exaggerating when I say, the entire right half of the church turned and looked at me and were making questioning faces and gestures trying to get me to tell them what was going on. I couldn't figure it out either and just shrugged in confusion.

I finally heard a couple voices singing and turned to figure out who it was and how they knew the right words and music to be singing...since the song the rest of the congregation was looking at was obviously wrong. It was my cousins, Fred and Kathy Bloom, who both have excellent, beautiful...and thankfully loud voices. Finally one of them shouted out the page number the song was actually on, so the rest of us could join in.

We had a meal after church today and everyone was like, "Soooo, Sarah...way to go on the page number of that hymn". I just smiled and said, "I guess even God has a sense of humor sometimes"! I don't know how I got the correct title in there and the wrong page, but I am positive of one thing: they will never let me forget about it... ESPECIALLY my dad.

That's the fun thing about being back in Liberal and going to the church I grew up in. Everyone knows me and has no problem giving me a hard time just as easily as they give me prayers, support, and great fellowship. God is good. Can I get an Amen?!

Friday, January 23, 2009


Let the madness begin. My goal this year is only to beat my sister, Amy, to the punch. She is super pyscho about Pancake Day and starts sending out Pancake Day reminder emails and such pretty early. It's great.

Anyway, for those that have never heard of International Pancake Day...where the heck have you been?! It's a race here in Liberal against women in Olney, England. (Liberal is ahead in the number of wins). Liberal gets out of school for the day and there are festivities starting that weekend up until Pancake day (Shrove Tuesday), when the races take place. We even have an International Pancake Day Hall of Fame now...and my dad is the tour guide! He's very involved with the Hall of Fame AND the Pancake Day Board. We like to call him Mr. Flapjack...(since Eldon Wyatt will forever be Mr. Pancake in our hearts!)

This year is the 60th year!!!!!! Can you believe it?! The new shirts are in and they are way cool. This year they have gray, lime green, and neon orange. They even have gray hoodies this year too! You can see the logo on the homepage: pancakeday.net. There is all kinds of fun information on there for you to peruse. If you scroll to the bottom of that homepage, you will also see a list of current merchandise and prices if you click on it. But for all you fellow Pancake Day Maniacs...if you want a shirt, you better send your money to someone in Liberal NOW...they won't last!!! And no, my dad did not make me advertise for them...I just LOVE me some Pancake Day, am excited it's the 60th year, and really do think the shirts rock this year!

The date is February 24th....so plan your Pancake Day party now and eat pancakes that whole day if you so choose! IHOP usually has free short stacks that entire day as well. So, see...there's no excuse!!


Plans for 2009

So I'm a bit behind..but here's what I want out of this new year.

1. To travel a bit more. It doesn't have to be anywhere exotic (although that would be spiffy), but I'd just like to get out of Western Kansas a bit more often!

2. To start saving money again...My retirement portfolio is extremely pathetic and embarrassing!

3. Get a new computer (I realize this won't help me save- shut up! lol)...I've been saying I was gonna do this for a year or more..but I still have my redneck contraption...a laptop that I spilled a glass of water on..so now the keyboard doesn't work and I have to hook up a keyboard to it...and it's old as hell and SLOW as hell.

4. Be more open-minded...I think I am pretty good at this most of the time, but still...

5. To convince my sister, Amy (Angie will never cave), to move here at least for awhile. COME ON!!! It would be fun. I mean, I don't want to live WITH you...just in the same town!

6. Visit my Granny more. She has Alzheimer's, is pretty much blind, and is just getting older. It makes me sad to see her this way and it can be very frustrating too. But I love her and don't want to ever feel lonely either.

7. Be more creative. I've done a lot of home improvement stuff and craft stuff this year, but no scrapbooking, no sewing, and no songwriting. I miss those.

8. Get to bed at a decent hour more frequently...so I can get up and get my ass to the gym more frequently. I prefer to go in the mornings...but lately have been having to go after work..and then it's too packed, stinky, hot, and annoying.

9. Do something crazy. Skydive, get another tattoo, white water rafting...you get the picture.

10. Be a better friend. I said this last year too..and I don't think I'm a bad friend..I think sometimes it's just too easy to get sucked into your own world, your own problems, your own life...that you forget to ask about those around you, keep up to date, be a shoulder to lean on, etc.

11. Write a book. Yep, I don't know what about...but I think it could be entertaining and would also help with #7.

12. Work on my germaphobia-ness. Although, let's be real...I'm not sure there is anyone or anything that can help with this issue.

13. Try harder to think before I speak. In this aspect, I am apparently just like my dad and tell it like it is...whether anyone wants to hear it and whether it's harsh or not. I think it could be good to be able to have that type of honesty, but I need to reign it in and be able to put things a bit more delicately perhaps.

14. Make new friendships. You can never have too many compadres.

15. See my nephew as much as possible!!! He's adorable, I love him, I miss him, I think they should also move closer, and I want to continue being the fave aunt! ha

16. Focus on the positive. This could probably go hand in hand with #13.

17. Learn the words to Ditty by Paperboy and Informer by Snow. Come on..you know you've always wished you knew them too. Robin does! I hate her for it.

18. Be a great bridesmaid to my two very best friends!! I love them mucho!!

19. Spend more time outside. I hate being hot and I hate being cold. I also hate wind. So this could be a challenge. Hmmm, after reading this, perhaps I need to reread #16.

20. Be thankful...for everything and everyone surrounding me.

21. Eat more corn..cause I love it and it's tasty.

22. Sell my house and buy a new one.

23. Hire someone to scoop poop. ha I hate that chore..and I should do that today now that I think about it.

24. Make the beater last through the year (it would help if dad would stop backing up into it!) My poor black beast of a ride!

25. Recycle more.

I think that's a good list. We'll see. Happy Late New Year to everyone.

When your MOM decideds your internal clock is ticking...

Many of you have heard the first few stories, but for those that haven't..sorry for the repeat. The rest is much more recent.

My mother, like all moms across the world, wants grandchildren...and wants them now! My younger sister, Angie, is married with a 2 year old now, but they live in Dallas and 1 grandchild is certainly not enough. A few years ago my mom sent me an email the day before Valentine's Day, my LEAST favorite holiday of the year (in fact, I usually prefer to protest it by wearing all black..hee hee). The email simply said, "Perhaps you should not wait, but just ask someone to marry you. You're biological clock IS ticking you know!" If you know my mom, you are laughing right now and know that she's a nut, but means well. But I'll admit, I didn't think it was too funny the day I read it or the next few actually. Now, I just shake my head and laugh with the rest of you. At the time, many of my friends suggested I email her back a picture of myself with the scariest guy I could find and say, "Will he do?".

Growing up, there were 2 guys that went my church with us, that she'd tell (only when I wasn't around to roll my eyes and die of embarrassement), "You know, when you grow up, Ken and I want you to know it's okay with us if you want to marry Sarah...because we just love you!" They'd come to school the next day and with a huge sigh, let me know my mom had suggested our future nuptials again. I'm sorry Bryan and Ryan!

Then, about 1.5 years ago...some friends from Liberal came to Goodland for my birthday. Jamie's grandparent's go to my church and had told her that during the prayer request part of the service, my mother had stood up and asked for people to pray that I find a husband and SOON! Of course, my friends thought this was hysterical (as did I actually) and filled me in on this story in front of as many other friends as they could. Thank you for that too ladies! = )

Now that I'm back in Liberal, I'm currently living with my truly giving, hilarious, and loving parents while I wait for my house in Goodland to sell. Two of my best friends are getting married this year, Januea and Robin. As soon as mom found out that they were getting married and I was in the bridal parties, she wanted to know who all the groomsmen were, if they were single, and if any of them could be a potential husband. I even had to show her Robin and Scott's wedding site where she could see the photos of all the boys. Ha. Then this past week I began the Leadership Liberal program. Thursday was the Kickoff Banquet and Friday was the first all day class. I came home and was sharing with the parental units some of the funny parts of the day and about some of the new people I had met. Of course, my mother's first statement was, "I'm glad you enjoyed it. I've been saying a little prayer that there will be a young, single, Christian man in that class for you to marry"! Of course you have been mom. Of course you have.

I guess it will never end. I'm just ready for my other sister, Amy, to get back from Africa...so perhaps some of the focus will be switched to her. She is, afterall, 4 years older...and 4 years closer to being labeled an old spinster! (Sorry Amy...I do love you...but it's your turn for awhile!)

In actuality, it really doesn't bother me, and I DO think it's quite entertaining. I'm just running out of witty responses to her determined quest.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

New-ness for a New Year

1. New job. I started the new year with a new job. I'm now the ED for a community foundation in my hometown the serves 10 counties. It's only 25 hrs/week, but pays almost what I was getting previously.

2. Got a new 2nd job. ha Since the other one is only 25 hrs, I decided i should be responsible and mature and get another job. I'm working in the mornings as the secretary at the church I grew up in.

3. New digs. Since I moved back to the hometown, I had to get new digs. My house in Goodland hasn't sold, so my new living quarters are....in the basement of good 'ol Mom & Dad's house!

4. New fog light. My dad backed into my car and knocked it one of the fog lights out (and did lots more damage to his own car...sorry dad!), so I'm getting a new one!

5. New names...my nephew Adam was home at Christmas and here til the 2nd. He's talking some now, so I got all kinds of new names. Some understandable...most not, but I'm sure all are good!

6. New socks. Yep, I needed some.

7. New diet plan...Santa gave me a book of all soup recipes. I LOVE soup and plan to make every single one (except for ones with anything fishy). I've already make the "Zesty Chicken & Corn Chowder" and found it to be quite delightful thank you very much!

8. New gym membership. It's back to the Wellness Center I go. Thank goodness. My butt needs a good kickin!

9. New puppy! Her name is Millie and she's a cute slobbery beagle. She loves the other dogs..they hate her so far.
JUST KIDDING!!! I know, you were all wanting to strangle me at the thought of a 3rd dog. But it would be kinda fun.
10. New plans for the future. My current plan is just to stop trying to make plans and deadlines for things in life that I can't control. Why cause disappointment and frustration when it would be nicer to just live in the moment and enjoy the surroundings!