So I bought a wheel barrow today. Went to Wally World yesterday for one and they didn't have any. Isn't that strange? Anyway, I found one at the lumber store today, paid way too much for it, and strangely...can't wait to use the damn thing. But what strikes me as odd is the name: wheel barrow. I don't know why, but when I say it... I feel as though I'm speaking gibberish. The barrow part always comes out wrong. It seems as though I'm making the words up. They just don't want to naturally roll off my tongue. I've noticed other words lately that have been the same. Maybe my mind is on overload and I'm overanalzing things again...but sometimes...words just seem frickin weird!
Earlier this week, my sister and I were laughing at some of the sayings our family uses...some are gross, twisted, and retarded. But they all are funny none the less. But again...they seem weird. Of course, it's no secret my family is insane...so I guess it should actually seem very natural and not weird at all.
Simply for your enjoyment and to add a bit of amusement to your day, I shall share some of these great sayings with you now. Use them often and fondly think of my granny as you do...as she is the one that taught them to us!
Okay...when someone burps, here are the appropriate responses you can choose from:
"Bring it up again and we'll vote on it".
"Save the orange and green pieces and we'll make a quilt".
"Divvies on the red chunks"!
"Better to burp and bare the shame, than not to burp and bare the pain!"
When someone farts, use one of these:
"I thought I heard a buck snort"!
"Who fired that shot"?
"Oh! The spider's are barking"!
"My uncle always told me that holding em in will make ya mean!"
"You do know that a fart is a message from gutsville to buttsville that there's a train coming down the track?" (disgusting I know..but admit it...you love it and can't wait to use this one!)
And last but not least...the one no one believes that I learned from my Granny....when you are losing a game, please be sure to use this phrase:
"Well, I'm losing again. I guess I'm the dog's hind tit."
People..I can't make this stuff up. I really did learn all this nonsense from my Granny. You want to meet her don't you? Well, she lives in Liberal and could tell ya lots of funny stories. You should go visit her really. Although, I would wear a "Depends" if I were you...cause she's a hoot! (Hoot...that's another odd one?!)
To my family members reading this...can you think of any I left out...I know there are more..but this was all I could think of at this moment in time.
P.S. A few more words I think are weird: poop, conquer, supper, tiki, and amarillo. Any words freakin your freak today?
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6 comments:
I always liked "holding them in makes you mean" so I try to use that one most often. Mostly I like Mario games...but this game called spore is coming out around Christmas. That is mainly why I bought it, and plus I haven't bought anything cool for a while. I think you should especially listen to the jazz records, Yesterday's New Quintet wins at life.
Yes, I will make a list, I've been working on it, but I'm stuck. It'll be done soon though. I think I might just put it in my blog under magical list of books.
I like the gutsville to buttsville one. That is funny.
Sick and twisted.
I think "orphan" is a weird word for some reason...
I think "enaurfla" is a weird word. That's what the spam blocker is making me type in order to post this....
@ Stevie- I'll keep the video game stuff in mind for Christmas. AND I seriously owe ya some birthday drinks next time I see ya!
@Clint- That's usually a fave!
@ David- You have NO IDEA! ha
@ Stacie- Orphan is a bizarre word.
I agree.
@ Robin- You're a freak! ha But you're right..sometimes those are hysterical.
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